Today my mind is working against me.
We are two days away from Xavier's surgery and I find myself thinking about all the what ifs. This painstaking process (and yes it's a process of digesting and accepting what we are going through) is consuming me with horrifying thoughts and vivid images of what could happen while Xavier is on the operating table...again.
What if something goes wrong? What if the worst happens?
My logical self says this is not worth thinking about. It will never happen. Or we'll cross that bridge when we get there.
But that fear monster inside me argues... how do you know? I never thought it would be our child who got cancer. But it happened. So I need to prepare myself, so I can deal with it. (I am a control freak, can you tell?)
These thoughts pass through my mind as I watch the most recent developments in the missing Mayalysian plane: how many of those passengers passed off the routine safety messages, tuned out the instructions because in their mind, it would never happen to them.
Unfortunately, in this case, those safety procedures would not have saved them. However, there will be a time when these safety procedures will safe a life.
The same rings true when planning for disasters or even fire safety plans: "It will never happen to me."
Well, it can and it does.
I am not saying we need to live in constant fear that something bad could happen or consume ourselves with what ifs. But we need to be cognizant that we are not invincible.
We need to listen and actively engage in the safety education that's out there; Appreciate the information we are handed to prevent, mitigate or prepare for such things.
I have learned the hard way that bad things can happen to us all. We can choose to pretend it won't or we can come to terms with it and REALLY appreciate the current state of our lives. Because in an instant -- it can be gone like the lives of the 239 people on Flight 370.
Don't take things for granted. Don't be miserable and above all don't judge -- because you never know what that person may be going through. Live for today.